Introduction

Many of us will find ourselves in some awkward positions and sometimes they occur from our own actions. However, many of us fail to recognize we cause the problems but rather spend our energy blaming other individuals and circumstances for our downfall. We blame the pastors, employers, coworkers, the Government, parents, spouses, children, siblings and the various institutions.

Ironically, when some individuals rise to the top or in a positive mode, they do not blame others but rather give credit to themselves for their achievements. The same way you give credit to yourself for some of your “high” moments, you should also take the blame for some of your “low” moments.

While it is true that some of us have issues due to ignorance, generational curses, witchcraft, jealousy, racism and prejudice, the truth is many of us think we know everything and only see the faults and weaknesses in others when in fact the problem is us.

Examine yourself

I believe at the end of each day, we should reflect on our actions and thoughts for the day. Ask yourselves why did you think and do the things you did today? Was it really someone else’s fault that things did not go the way they should have gone? Was it something I could have done differently?  Why am I blaming everyone else but myself? Why do people have a certain attitude towards me? Why no one wants to talk to me?  Why are people always talking about me? Why do I make the same mistakes multiple times. Why did I assume that thought about that person?

You see many of us believe that people are jealous of us and sometimes this is not true as some of these individuals are not even thinking about you. In fact, you are thinking about them more than they are thinking about you.  Be cognizant of the fact that more than one person can have the same idea and as result may pursue the same thing that you plan to do without even knowing you were planning to do the same thing.

During your time of reflection, hopefully you will come to a realization that you are part of the problem.

Own and accept yourself as the problem

It is very hard to accept the fact that you are the problem. Recognize that you are not perfect and therefore you have weaknesses and so some of the issues you encountered in life is because of you.

I believed as you mature and focused on your actions, you will realize everything that happens to you cannot be somebody’s else fault. Once you recognize that you are part of the problem, put a plan in place to change your thoughts and actions.

Change your outlook

Put yourself in someone else position. Stop making assumptions about others. Stop believing one side of a story.  Stop talking about people behind their backs. Try to stop blaming others. Try to make the change that you believe others should have done.

Stop and listen attentively to the other individuals. Sometimes you are so quick that you do not even take the time to listen to others. Sometimes you are not doing your part.

Equip yourself to become qualified. Don’t blame others for your rejection when you know you are not qualified.

Conclusion

Ask the people that you are blaming what they think about you. Our actions determine our outcomes. Be conscious of what you say and do about other others. Finally, be willing to approach the individuals to discuss your concerns.