Where are most of the men?

Multi ethinc group men cheering at home

Where are most of the men?

We don’t just need a few men – all men need to be a part of the solution


A female friend of mine called me a few weeks ago and asked me where the men are. This prompted me to write this article and to do a series on my YouTube channel.

I don’t know what is happening in the rest of the world, but I know in the Turks and Caicos, women are more visible than men and seem to be doing more than men. I cannot blame the women because if men are not doing what they are supposed to do, then the women will no doubt assume the roles as the roles have to be occupied.

Now don’t get me wrong because there are some men who have taken up their rightful positions in society, but these men are few. I believe one of the reasons why societies are falling apart is due to the absence of men in their positions. It is time all men not only become visible but also to take up their rightful positions.

Are most of the men too busy?

Are most of the men too busy with their careers that they don’t have time to do anything else? Perhaps they are too busy but so are most women, but many women are finding the time to play their part in society. Men must be able to balance their time and they should never be too busy to be fathers to their children or mentors to other people in society. Is it because some men believe if they provide the finances for the family, they have done their part?

Are most of the men absent from the home?

Too many women are raising children by themselves. The same way, it takes a man and woman to produce a child, it takes a man and a woman to raise a child. When a man is absent from the home, it impacts that child emotionally. A man does not have to be living in the same house as the child, but a man needs to be present in the life of his children. Too many of our young people have turned to gangs because their fathers are absent in their lives. These young boys and girls are looking for someone to provide them with attention and care and they believe they are getting that from the gangs. All of this can be avoided if men become a part of their children’s lives. If men do their part, perhaps there will be less gangs and less criminal activities.

Are most of the men not in church?

We have so many women who are leaders in churches today. Perhaps it is because most men are not coming to church. It is time, men return to the church. The church is the foundation that can hold our society together. If we can get the men in the church, perhaps more young men will follow suit and if they are in the church and are grounded in the word, our societies will be better.

Are most of the men drinking and smoking?

Too many of our men are spending their time drinking alcohol and smoking. The money that they spent on consuming alcohol and smoking could be used for something else. Also, the time that men spend drinking, that time could have been used doing something productive in society. You see the only people benefiting from drinking and smoking are the businesses and individuals who are selling these products.

Are most of the men busy pursuing multiple women?

There are some men that are in a monogamous relationship but there are many men who have multiple women. Some men just want to be with every woman they see and consequently they pursue multiple women including married women. There are too many social issues in our country and one of the reasons is that some men are not faithful and are not committed to one woman. I encourage men to stick to one partner. Remember some of you have daughters and sisters, the same thing you do to other women, somebody will do it to your daughters and sisters.

Why are there not more men educators?

Virtually, every school in Turks and Caicos is dominated by women whether as teachers or principals. More men are needed in the schools. Perhaps some men are not in the schools because maybe it is perception, that teaching is the role of women or because the pay scale for teachers are low and men believe they can make more money doing something else. Our children need to be taught by both men and women as society is not just made up of women. I encourage men who want to be teachers to pursue your teaching career and don’t be ashamed to be in that field. Teachers are very important in society as everybody needs a teacher. Quite frankly, all schools require the presence of men. Some students particularly the young men need to be handled by a man.


Men must do better.  I commend those few men who are doing their part such as being great fathers and being involved in the community whether as volunteers in sports or mentors at the schools or other organizations. We can save the next generation if men take up their rightful positions. Our society is crying for the men to do something. Our young people are crying for the men and some of us do not even realize it. One of the solutions to address violence and issues with our young people and adults is for men to rise up and take their positions.

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